**ANONYMOUS POST** Touchy Feely Creepy Crawly

In year 9 I was touched by a boy in a place that I didn’t want to be touched. We were in 4th period, woodwork class and we were sitting on the benches watching a video about different types of tree grains. Clearly everyone was bored. I was sitting next to one of the most popular guys in the grade. We hardly spoke, If anything, our only interaction were a few glances across the room. I was hardly into boys then, I was enjoying sport, my friends and trying to find my place in a school that had so many different clicky groups.

As we were sitting on the bench, I noticed he started moving closer to me. It was winter, however our school still enforced sport skirts on sport Wednesdays. Ever so slowly I felt his hands rub up and down my outside thigh. I was frozen. Firstly I had no idea why he was touching me and secondly, I was confused as to what to do. It kind of felt ok, but I had never been touched like that before… I looked over at him awkwardly and he was smiling at me, motioning that it was ok. A few moments later, he placed his jumper over my lap and his hands started moving towards my privates. What only lasted 15-20 seconds of him touching me felt like eternity. I was mortified, yet still frozen. I was confused. Did he love me? These kind of notions are surely done by people who were in love? I’m only 14, but I thought he must really like me to do this… It was only that he was interrupted by a pencil case falling on the ground that he stopped, quickly pulling his hand out and dusting it off, as if he’d just touched something sacred. Well he had. We never spoke after that, nor did we even look at each other. But I did feel violated. But we were young… And I thought it was normal…

Fast forward 20 years. I’m not scarred by this, but I worry every day that one of my daughters will experience this, and I pray to god one of my sons doesn’t do this to ANYONE. Because even though it was a nonchalant experience that I shrugged off back then, it clearly wasn’t pleasant and I’m still confused about how I felt. But I know now it wasn’t right, and I doubt he’d even remember let alone care how that made me feel so long ago…

 

(This post is by an anonymous writer. Please respect their decisions and feelings when and if commenting).